Sharing Our Journey – Aging Consciously

Have you noticed the synchronicity of things? Lately the same words keep popping up in whatever I’m listening to or reading…vulnerability, authenticity, grounding, letting go and loss. I’ve been thinking about letting go.

I’m sure most of us can remember trips in which we traveled with another person, several friends, possibly our children. I remember traveling from Mississippi to Louisiana with my mother. I was probably under six or seven years old. Momma had a good voice and sang when we rode along…. all the popular songs of that era…. Vaya con Dios, How Much is that Doggie in the Window, Shoeshine Boy. I still remember most of the words to those old songs and the views passing along outside the window as we sang past them.

I remember a trip from Jackson, Ms. to Houston, Texas to spend the summer with my aunt and cousins when I was in my late teens. I think that was the result of a lost love. I rode a Greyhound bus through the night. There I was, riding on a bus full of people I didn’t know. It sounds strange now but was a common way to travel then. We were all going somewhere but not all to the same place. I don’t think I really spoke to anyone on the bus the whole trip. It was dark and peaceful with the occasional murmur of voices and the hum of the motor as a lullaby. We stopped somewhere (El Paso?) for a brief break. It felt a bit alien and strange. Even from this distance in time, I can remember the glare of the bright overhead lights and the announcements over the loudspeaker. Oddly enough I can’t remember a thing about the return trip later that summer except my mom meeting me at the station.

All through our lives we share journeys with others – those close to us and with strangers. Sometimes those journeys are not really lifetime trips, they are sojourns in time spent with people who share our lives briefly. Then, we leave them behind or they leave us. We learn as we grow older, not all relationships are enduring but there is something to learn and value from most.

There’s a quality called resilience and it’s one of life’s greatest tools. When my son was in college I told him, ‘it’s kind of like riding a snowboard. You’re flying down the mountain and hit a mogul, your body must relax a little, your knees give a little and you just keep riding.’

It’s kind of like riding a snowboard. You’re flying down the mountain and hit a mogul, your body must relax a little, your knees give a little and you just keep riding.

The first very best friend that I had was in the 3^rd grade. We did all the things kids do that year…rode our bikes, played ball with others in the neighborhood, hung out at recess, and had a clubhouse. Then, my family moved, and I never saw her again. It was a moment of heartbreak and a moment of growing up. I learned people in our lives aren’t always permanent, but I also learned what a true friendship was, and I still treasure that first one.

We move through life with a lot of people – parents, first loves, first betrayals, employers, friends and family. Part of life and aging is learning to let go – let go of painful experiences to make room for healthier ones, let go of forever homes to build a new life under present circumstances, in some cases let go of anger to find peace. Sometimes we want to move on but often we don’t. Always, always – if we are aware of our experiences – we’re ultimately traveling with ourselves. We leave behind that young girl on her first trip alone. We eventually leave behind the woman who enjoyed jogging until she had a knee replaced, and the dark hair that is now grey or silver, the young son grown into the one with a family of his own, and the daughter who has a grown son. By then we should know, that’s not the end. It’s a goodbye and the beginning of another journey and new adventures if we’re willing to travel forward and not hang onto the past.